This Cannot Happen

I have been watching this story for a few days now in disbelief.  A loving family, torn apart because the parents and children share fatness as one of their traits.  There are so many children already in foster care and up for adoption who will NEVER FIND PARENTS and rather than seeking out a home for those, people are removing children from their families because of weight stigma.  This is a disgrace.  If you would like to do something about this here are the links to some of the officers involved in this case.  It is only a matter of time before this starts happening right here in the US.

Dundee County chief executive David Dorward: david.dorward@dundeecity.gov.uk.

Dundee County public relations head Les Roy: les.roy@dundeecity.gov.uk

Dundee County education director Michael Wood: michael.wood@dundeecity.gov.uk

Dundee County Social Services direct Alan G. Baird: alan.baird@dundeecity.gov.uk

NAAFA Convention Day 3: Advocacy and Poetry

Thank you all for sticking with me through my journey to NAAFA and back!  Day three kicked off, for me, with a workshop about child advocacy.  NAAFA has created a Child Advocacy Toolkit (available here)  to help educators and other professionals shift from "fighting childhood obesity" to teaching HAES based principles including intuitive eating and joyful movement.  In the workshop, we heard from several presenters about how the so-called "war on childhood obesity" started and what is and isn't true about it.  The first part of the presentation was particularly well-executed in that it summarized the facts and fictions surrounding this war in a simple, non-threatening way that I think would be really useful for people who are new to fat acceptance and may have some reservations.  The panel also reviewed what the consequences are for a weight-based approach, both in terms of health and in terms of bullying.

Later in the day, I attended a poetry workshop called Fat Poets' Society.  I have to admit that I wrote a lot of poetry when I was in high school and as an undergraduate, but after I left Cornell, I pretty much stopped writing altogether.  There are a lot of reasons why (too busy trying to make ends meet, not angsty and love-lorn anymore, etc.) but I always wanted to keep writing, I just felt that blogging and creative non-fiction were more my strong suits.  But I decided to go anyway and I'm really glad that I did.  We talked about using poetry as a means of being an activist and how writing body-positive poetry can be a radical thing to do.  It is easy to forget that poetry isn't just about love and pretty-sounding words, but that it can also have political goals.  We read some poetry and then we had some time to sit down and write, and then share what we had written.  It was such a moving experience, getting to hear different women's experiences with their bodies and with each others' bodies.  And it made me realize that my relationship with poetry is not over yet, so somehow, I'm going to find the time to start writing again!*

That evening was the NAAFA Talent Show!  Before we could get up there and show off our various talents, we did some karaoke to get us all warmed up.  It was great seeing fat people up in the spotlight--willing to put themselves out there--because they felt so brave, confident and safe.  I don't think I've ever done karaoke before, but I couldn't resist with a crowd so accepting.  The talent show was just an extension of that safe feeling.  People sang, performed poetry and spoken word pieces, and of course, the classic fortuneteller act!  I was fortunate enough to be convinced by a friend to recite some of my own poetry, including a piece I had written that day at the workshop!  It was great seeing how talented all my new friends really are, and how comfortable they were sharing their work with us.

The talent show was followed by a film festival.  I only caught the first film, The Fat Body (In)Visible, but it was a great piece that followed two women who had met on the Livejournal Fatshionista community, so it was exciting to get to see the blogging community represented at the conference.  The movie also contained pictures from the Adipositivity Project, which was great to see put to music up on the big screen.

Monday morning, I had to head back to the real world (sadly) but several members of NAAFA stayed on to lobby on Capitol Hill for the inclusion of bullying based on weight to the current anti-bullying legislature going through Congress.  Members of the board gave a press conference that was covered by C-Span and the story was also picked up by CNN's website.  Please check out both links to see NAAFA in action trying to end weight-based bullying in our schools.

All in all, my first NAAFA conference was a huge success.  It was so empowering to be surrounded by smart, talented, dedicated fat people who want to make the same change in the world as I do.  I feel much stronger in my beliefs and much more confident as a blogger, activist and fat person than before I went.  Best of all, I made some great new friends to share the journey with me.  Thank you NAAFA, see you in San Francisco next year!

*You can purchase the first publication by the Fat Poets' Society at amazon.com. 

Genetics is Not Child Abuse

I was blissfully away at the beach yesterday when the news broke about whether parents should lose custody of obese children.  Most of what needs to be said has already.

When I read things like this I can't even describe the anger I feel.  Personally, I feel scared because I am a young woman (24 in less than a week!) who is planning on having children in the next 3-4 years.  Honestly, I'm not sure I am willing to put up with this kind of stuff.  From children's lunch habits being monitored in school, to forcing them to eat school lunches so I can't give them what I want (or more importantly what they want) to threatening to take them away if they are not the "right" size.  I want to teach my kids to have a healthy relationship with food and a positive attitude towards moving their bodies, and it seems like the ENTIRE WORLD wants something else for me.  A part of me just wants to give up now and not have children at all.

Professionally, I feel that this is an incredible waste of resources.  The foster system in this country is incredibly crowded.  There are thousands of children being bumped from home to home for all kinds of legitimate reasons.  To take fat kids, who suffer enough in this crazy society to begin with, and put them in this system that so often fails is criminal.  Honestly, the parents who force their kids on diets should be the ones deemed child abusers, but nobody sees Michelle Obama's children being taken away from her do they?

Instead of all this finger-pointing, maybe we should focus on healthcare for everyone and education in this country that isn't fat-phobic and disordered-eating-inducing.  Maybe we should teach parents to teach their children to eat when they are hungry and stop when they are full and eat what their body wants.  And maybe we should stop looking at physical characteristics as death sentences.  This obsession over fat children has to end, because the people who suffer the most, of course, are the children themselves.

Please check out Lesley at Two Whole Cakes and April at I AM in Shape. Round is a shape. for their takes on this nightmarish idea.